i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I just had sex on a roof
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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