some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
You were trust falling into bushes
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
