I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
