remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
