is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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