youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
