Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
