OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
