You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
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