Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
