wanna go halves on a baby?
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
