The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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