it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I can't turn off my feet"
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
