Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize