I heard we made out
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
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