there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
