dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Randomize