i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
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