You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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