brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
