It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
hell yes lets make some ravioli
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I just forgot I was standing up.
Randomize
