yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
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