I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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