Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Randomize
