You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
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