Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize