did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Randomize
