Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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