i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Sober January is a disaster.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Randomize
