If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
