ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
