he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
The power of my boobs compel you
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
