Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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