ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Randomize
