She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
