And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
