so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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