Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize