Who did Billy Mays play for?
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
