dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
