is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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