He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Randomize
