After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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