it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
