Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Randomize
