I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Drake has all the answers
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
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