Rock
Scissors
Fuck
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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