I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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