Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
