There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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