Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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