so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
