So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
