That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
She announced her abortion via fbk
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
